Disorganization

I don't think there is anything more disorganized in my life then my brain. It's essentially the root of all my personal problems that I won't go into here. My sleeping "disorder" (I use quotes because you have to be diagnosed with a disorder) is caused by my brain because I'm up till 5 a.m. every night just from thinking--about anything: life, school, women, super powers...In fact the other night I was up till 7 in the morning just laying in my bed thinking about the necessary real life actions I'd have to take if I won the lottery and what I'd do with it. Another thing that scares me about my brain is it's inconsistency. One minute all I want for breakfast is Coco Krispies then the next day i'll be so turned off by Coco Krispies I'd op not to even eat breakfast if it was all I had to eat which I feel carries over into other parts of my life. Will I quickly grow tire of other things? Like will I wake up one day and just not be attracted to my wife? I know relationships in the early years of my life can't be compared to the women I'll one day marry but it's still a pretty scary thing to think about I guess. On the other end of the spectrum, however, I love my brain. I like how my brain processes things and I like it's outlook on things and sometimes it's quick reaction time woos me. So this love hate relationship I guess is the negative outcome of growing up because it's just eager to grow and learn and be mature way before I'm suppose to and it's a mixed blessing because sometimes you have to enjoy your immaturity. I guess by having to grow up fast I narrowed my choices for a mate down to just women older than I so that we can be on the same page mentally I suppose. Honestly though at this point I think I'll just marry the first beautiful charming women I meet that can make my laugh.